Deepwater

Momma decided we needed to learn to swim the summer before I turned twelve. Living in the landlocked Dallas area, with summer temperatures hovering around 100 degrees and a boiling sun that crisped my fair skin, swimming wasn’t at the top of my Summer Fun to-do List.

She registered my sisters and me for swim lessons at the local Parks & Rec Center. And it began. After days of learning to float, flap (arms), and flip (legs/feet)—first on the burning sidewalk around the pool, then in the blessedly cool water—I was ready for the swimmer’s test—at least, that’s what the teenage swim instructor said.

On test day, I wasn’t too worried. I’d done okay during the swim classes. In my quasi-confidence, I forgot that anytime I was in trouble, all I had to do was stand up in the shallow water.

The instructor led a short line of dripping ten-to-twelve-year-olds to the pool’s deep end. Wow. The water looked scarier from that perspective. Deep. Menacing. My fear began to rise.

“Walk to the end of the low diving board. Jump in, push up from the bottom of the pool, and swim to the surface. Then, swim out to the rope, turn around, and swim back to the ladder edge of the pool. That’s it. Alright, let’s go!” 

One by one, my swim classmates walked to the end of the diving board and perfectly executed the instructions.

My turn. My heart raced, and my legs shook as I walked the plank – diving board, that is. I froze at the end of the board.

“Jump! You can do it. Jump!” Instructor, helpers, and classmate voices urged me on.

So, I jumped.

Full-blown panic set in the minute I hit the water. It worsened as I plummeted to the depths of the pool. I began to choke and flail wildly. I finally broke through the surface in complete panic mode. One of the helpers jumped in the water. The instructor started yelling instructions – I have no idea what he said. I was too busy drowning to listen.

The helper tried to reach me but retreated when he realized the danger I posed in my uncontrollable state. I went under again, then resurfaced spluttering. The instructor held a long pole with a hooked end out towards me. He wanted me to grab it, but again, I was preoccupied with drowning.

Finally, he got the hooked end in position and physically hauled me out of the pool. Choking, shaking, and shivering in the hot Texas sun, I thought I would die from embarrassment.

That was the first of several repeat performances; each ended with the hook. Days later, I tried again and performed well enough to get my swimmer’s certification. (Honestly, I think they gave me the certificate, hoping I would go away.)

I was in depths way over my head. In my total panic, I forgot that I knew how to float. I desperately needed help, but my frantic flailing and attempts to save myself prevented potential rescuers from getting close enough to help me.

Psalm 69:1-2 ESV

When we are in trouble, we cry out to God for help. “Lord, get me out of this mess. God, I need you now. Help! Now!”

Then, while waiting for God to show up, we immediately attempt to fix the situation ourselves. Our attempted self-rescue is usually more harmful than helpful.

We complicate matters, causing unnecessary friction, distress, pain, and panic – for ourselves and those around us. We make it hard for help to break through. Our focus on thrashing and struggling makes it impossible to recognize help when it arrives.

All the while, we sink deeper beneath the threatening waters.

I think we misunderstand the idea of waiting. Whether we’re discussing waiting in the biblical sense or looking at a contemporary definition, the meaning is the same.

Waiting is the idea of pushing the pause button. It sets aside the feverish, frantic self-saving activity to focus on the help to come. The primary definition of the term implies eager anticipation.

Metaphorically speaking, it doesn’t mean you stop trying to reach the surface if you are underwater. It means you calm your spirit, clear your mind, respond biblically and rationally, and focus on the One who can deliver you.

Psalm 25:5 ESV

When you fear that the deep waters of a bad situation, challenging circumstances, dysfunctional relationships, or adversity will drown you, wait for the LORD.

What do you do in times of waiting? Here are a few ideas that I’ve found helpful:

  • Pray. Tell God what is happening and how you feel about it. Yes, He already knows, but He wants to hear from you. And you need to open your hurting heart before your Heavenly Father. Hebrews 4:16 Romans 12:12
  • Meditate on God’s Word. Read passages of encouragement, reminders of God’s unchanging character, and passages that define who you are in Christ Jesus. Psalm 54:4 Psalm 121:1-2 Hebrews 13:6
  • Stay the Course. Keep on keeping on. Don’t give up. God’s deliverance will come in His perfect timing – not yours. It may not be what you hoped for, but it will be His best for you. James 1:12 Hebrews 12:1

Waiting is difficult…even harder when you fear you’ll drown before your Rescuer pulls you to dry ground. Pray. Meditate on God’s Word. Stay the Course.

Psalm 93:4 ESV
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