Tangled & Knotted

Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself…

Psalm 37:7

The harder I worked to untangle the snarled fine chains, the more entangled they became and the tighter the knots. Tears of anger and frustration began to fall down my four-year-old cheeks. My two favorite necklaces had done it again –Totally wrapped themselves together and tied themselves into knots making neither wearable!

I shook them again and pulled more fiercely on the loose ends. About that time my mom walked in. When she tried to take the tangled necklaces from my hands, I protested “I can do it!”

“Not that way, you can’t. You’re making it worse. The harder you pull, the tighter you make the knot. You’ll never get it untangled the way you’re doing it – you’ll end up breaking the chains. Let me show you how to do it.”

She took the chains from my hands, then explained that the only way to get the knots out and untangle the chains was to lay the tangled mess down and gently, patiently loosen the knots with my fingers or toothpicks. Then she showed me how to do it.

Honestly, I have no idea when I began to see this mom-lesson-in-untangling as an analogy for my walk with Christ, but eventually, I did. For years now, when I get into a difficult situation, I think of the process that Mom explained to me: lay it down, turn it loose, gently – patiently work through the knots and tangles.

Notice, I said that I “think” of the process…I’m still working on consistently putting into practice the spiritualized version of this process.  

It’s a combination of my Type A overachiever personality type (I can do it myself) and my “old fleshly” self (I want to be the one in control) that will try to take over the situation anytime there’s the slightest opening. That combo is a losing duo…every time! Truth is – whatever your Type, when paired with your “old man” – it’s a loser.

The immediate “go to” strategy for the “old man+” is to start pulling all the loose ends – tightening the knots – worsening the tangle; taking a bad situation and making it “badder.” Not a word, I know, but it seems appropriate.

Scripture lays out the principles clearly, like my momma did for me:

Lay it down. Bring it to Jesus. Whatever the challenge, the trial, the problem, the disaster, the heartache, the pain, whatever it is – lay it at His feet.

“Cast your burden on the LORD, and He will sustain you; He will never permit the righteous to be moved.” Psalm 55:22 ESV

Psalm 55:22 ESV

“I relieved your shoulder of the burden; your hands were freed from the basket. In distress you called, and I delivered you; I answered you in the secret place of thunder….”

Psalm 81:6-7 ESV

Turn it loose. That may sound like a no-brainer, but how often do we bring a burden to God in prayer, lay it down, and then pick it right back up and take it with us when we go? Answer for yourself, but for me – it’s too often!

Luke gives us a great example of this principle:

“And behold, some men were bringing on a bed a man who was paralyzed, and they were seeking to bring him in and lay him before Jesus, but finding no way to bring him in, because of the crowd, they went up on the roof and let him down with his bed through the tiles into the midst before Jesus.”

Luke 5:18-19 ESV

The friends of the paralyzed man recognized they could not solve their friend’s dire situation, so they brought the man to Jesus. Undaunted by the crowds that made it impossible to enter the place where Jesus was, the men climbed to the top of the building, pulled up the roofing tiles, then lowered their friend still in his bed to the place where Jesus was standing.

Then they turned loose. Their friend was now in Jesus’ hands. The friend’s healing and his salvation was no longer their responsibility. They could not solve their friend’s problem; they had already tried and failed.

When Jesus said, “Man, your sins are forgiven you,” the friends didn’t jiggle the ropes to get Jesus’ attention and yell down “wait, Jesus – that’s not why we brought him to you – we brought him for healing.” They turned loose and trusted the burden of their friend’s situation to Jesus.

Finally, exercise gentleness and patience. No matter how long (or short) it may have taken to create the “mess” (whatever it may be) we have turned over to God, we’re usually looking for a quick fix. We are creatures of the immediate – we don’t like waiting. But you and I both know, that’s generally not the way it works. It takes time to remove the knots and untangle the entwined chains.

That repair work is the work of God’s Holy Spirit; it is part of our growing and maturing process. The Holy Spirit does the transforming work with our cooperation and participation.

The “it takes time” factor is one of the reasons Scripture reminds us to be actively pursuing the fruit of the Spirit by walking in step with God’s Holy Spirit:

“But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. …But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”

Galatians 5:16, 22-23 ESV

“But as for you, O man of God, flee these things. Pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness.”

1 Timothy 6:11 ESV

“… walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love….”

Ephesians 4:1-2 ESV

As I thought about sharing this story with you, I remembered seeing one of those necklaces in a tiny box down in the basement – the second necklace is long gone. I searched last evening and found the surviving necklace and true to form, it was tangled with another necklace. The photo at the top of this blog is my tiny heart locket from long ago intertwined and knotted with another chain that shared space in the little storage box.

Armed with toothpicks it took about 20 minutes to loosen, untangle, and de-knot the two chains so that I could take a picture (above) of the untangled chain.

Lay it down. Turn it loose. Gently, patiently working and waiting as the knots are undone and the snarled chains untwisted.

Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.”

James 1:12 ESV
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